We have finally broken the LG, and it has spilled its guts about the LG Secret, third in their Black Label series. We now know everything. Everything!
The carbon fiber clamshell casing, the same material used for the making of aircraft, this is nothing shocking to us. It carries 100MB internal memory, expandable to 4GB with the Micro SD, this is good. We also now know that the Secret auto-synchronises with the PCs via Bluetooth, that its 2.4" touchscreen is resolved at 240 x 320, that it auto-adjusts the screen lighting to ensure readability, and that it auto-rotates the display should we tip the phone on its side. We tipped the phone many, many times to ensure this information is the truth.
BUT! The LG has also made the claim of a 5-megapixel camera AND that it will take the video at 120 frames per the second AND DivX-certified recording AND that this is the thinnest camera in its class in the world. Do we believe this information? Let us say we believe it for now. But as the LG Secret is but 11.8mm thick, we suspect its sensor may not be up to snuff. Our glorious state's photographers assured us under interrogation that the sensor is more important than the megapixels.
Rollout will be in Europe first, blitzkrieging through Asia, South America, and the world in the months following. The LG refuses to tell us how much will be the retail price, but we expect to know this shortly. A SquareTrade warranty will be mandatory for all citizens! Though they may choose whether Accidental Damage coverage is to be added, in case their Secret is... poorly kept.
All citizens reading this document without the proper authorization will be shot! Possibly we should have mentioned this sooner.
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